Etiquette Dilemma: How Do I Pick My Bridesmaids?

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I’m getting married in two years and I’ve met a lot of friends within my college career because I’ve transferred twice already. How do I politely get around not having everyone in my bridal party?

Wedding planning would be so much easier without all the people involved, right? Seriously, you are great to be concerned with your friends’ feelings and wanting to make sure that you don’t offend anyone. The easiest solution: stick to family and keep your wedding party small. Your friends won’t question your sisters and your fiance’s cousins standing up at the altar with you.

But chances are, you do want some of your friends with you, too. If it helps, your bridal party can be as big as you want it to be. Have 20 close friends that you love? It is perfectly fine if you fit them all in (yes, even if your fiance only has two groomsmen).

Bottom line: Wait awhile before inviting anyone to be a bridesmaid. Two years is a long engagement; you have plenty of time. Once the time comes, select your bridesmaids and give the others positions of honor such as performing a reading at your ceremony or manning the guest book. Be as generous and kind as you can. Don’t make excuses or feel the need to explain your decision–that generally just makes it worse. Some might be a little offended, but if you put the effort into showing them that you value them as a friend, they will move past it.

For more answers to all of your wedding etiquette dilemmas visit our Planning & Etiquette guide.

 

Photo Credit: Scobey Photography

about the author
Sarah Sarah has been editing the blog at mywedding for four years. She enjoys watching classic movies, spending money on eyeliner that she never wears, and convincing brides to write thank you notes.

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