Newlywed Perspective: Reflections on Planning With Mom

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As I’m guessing all of you know, this past weekend a little holiday called “Mother’s Day” rolled around. And, although that holiday has come and gone, it remains the topic of my conversation this week – mostly because, although Mother’s Day is always noted in my family with cards and flowers and oftentimes other goodies, this year that one day really got me thinking.

I think it started with wedding photos. Or maybe with a brief conversation that my mother and I had regarding my younger brother’s upcoming wedding – a conversation where we looked back at last year as I was planning my wedding and laughed about several things that there was absolutely no way we were laughing about at the time.

If I’m being honest, wedding planning has its challenges. And I think that those challenges are different for everybody, and I think that one of the challenges that I came across when I was laying down details and making decisions was the way my mother and I interacted over a few wedding details. We learned, in several of those laughable situations, that we plan things very differently. And because she, as someone who cares deeply about me, wanted to be involved and help, and because I wanted her to be involved, we definitely got to learn very quickly how to best work together!

But, as the above photo hopefully shows, I wouldn’t have had my wedding planning process work out any differently. I love my mother so gosh darn much. She’s the best. She’s fun and supportive and loving and has a great eye for details and looks dang good in that purple dress. And I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t have tried on a veil or discovered that I wanted a dress with a train if she hadn’t firmly suggested that I at least try them out before I said no.

Sidenote: If you don’t think you want a veil, try one on first. Seriously.

So, in light of the recent celebration of mothers, I just wanted to say thank you to mine. Our relationship (like all relationships) has its ups and downs and good and bad, but every bit of it is worth it. Especially when it comes to planning your wedding. And laughing about planning your wedding over a pre-Mother’s-Day sushi lunch. Thank goodness for both.

about the author
Anne Anne is a serial optimist and hopeless romantic living in a big red barn in Colorado with her husband Shayne. She loves black and white films and making messes in the kitchen and considers life wholly incomplete without a regular dose of dark chocolate.

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