Here are questions 5 & 6 of Ethan and Anne's premarital counseling experience. If you need to play a little catch up: read questions from day one and two first. Anne and Ethan said by this point they were feeling a bit more comfortable spilling intimate details of their relationship with the minister.
5. Are my fiancé and I unable to resolve conflicts?
Anne: Ethan mentioned in his answer to a previous question that I have a tendency to discuss conflicts to the point of exhaustion. He's used the term "beating a dead horse" more than once. This may be true, but I grew up in a home where we didn't talk about any issues or emotions until they reached a boiling point, which usually happened during a holiday dinner or at some other totally inappropriate time with unlucky witnesses. I don't ever want that to happen to us, so I like to resolve an issue before we put it to bed.
Ethan: Speaking of bed, did I mention that make-up sex is the best part of any disagreement? Can I say that to a minister? I hear some couples brag that they never argue, but I don't think that this is actually admirable. Besides the bonus of making up, I think it's healthy for two individuals to be able to speak their minds, have totally different opinions, and still maintain a great relationship. It's sad when one person just turns over and gives up in order to placate the other, and it's even worse the way that some girls (and maybe guys too) insist that "nothing" is bothering them, even though they're pouting in silence or storming around in a huff. I am happy that Anne beats conflicts into submission rather than taking one of these passive aggressive routes, even though it's irritating at times to have to discuss a petty argument until the break of dawn. It's all worth it, I know.
6. Does my fiancé exhibit dishonesty?
Anne: Ethan is so wedded to truth-telling that he won't even let me tell a telemarketer that he's not at home when he's there. The guy is sickeningly honest, although he's crafty with his "truthiness" (thanks for the terminology, Stephen Colbert). For example, when I ask him trick questions like whether my pants make my bum look big, or if he wants to visit my parents over the next long weekend-he always finds a PC, but truthful way to answer me. Overall, I'd say he's one of the most honest guys I know.
Ethan: Anne is the queen of the feel-good lie, which when it is directed at me is only intended to make me feel more confident (i.e. "Of course it was great for me, honey"). However, she is never dishonest in a way that's serious, or meant to cause harm to anyone. I really value trustworthiness, and I would not be marrying a person who I felt had the potential to keep important things from me.
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