Wedding Blog

One of the most symbolic elements of weddings, right up there with cutting the cake and strolling down the aisle, is the giving of wedding gifts. However, many guests fail in this department. Thanks to Hollywood and movies, we have painted a picture of what an acceptable wedding gift is and few people are brave enough to wander off of that path. The result is a new bride and groom inundated with household appliances and doo-dads they don't really need, or, if they do need them, they receive more than one. If you want to avoid this generic gift giving trap, read this article and avoid these 10 gifts like the plague!

1) Coffee Makers
Mention the words "wedding gift" in a crowded room and most people will instantly think of this. That alone should be a tip-off to not give a coffee maker to a new couple. These days more and more couples are waiting to get married. By the time they do, they most likely already live together and this household appliance was already taken care of long ago.

2) Toasters
Ditto for toasters. Not only did the bride or groom's parents already buy them one, they most likely already own one. Buying generic household appliances as wedding gifts also just screams "I put no real thought or effort into this." It advertises the fact that you stayed on the safe side and took that common path. If this isn't the message you want to send with your gift, avoid all appliances.

3) Picture Frames
It's easy to make this mistake. Many guests think "Hmm, wedding and honeymoon pictures. Why not get them a frame to put them all in?" It sounds logical, but unfortunately, almost every other guest is probably thinking the exact same thing. Plus, picture frames are not very hard to find. It's very likely that the bride and groom already have some, most likely received as gifts from other guests. For this reason, don't buy them picture frames unless you know they truly need or want one. If you really think the idea of picture frames would fly with this particular couple, consider giving them with a picture of your friendship or of them early in their relationship already in it.

4) Engraved Wine Glasses
This seems original, thoughtful, and you might wonder why it's on this list. However, a bride we interviewed for this article (who chose to remain anonymous) told us a story from her wedding day. As it turned out, she received these from multiple guests, and remembers thinking "Geez, how many more sets of wine glasses with our names and anniversary are we going to get? Enough is enough!" Engraved wine glasses are also something brides and grooms often already have for use at their wedding reception.

5) Fruit Baskets
Next on the generic wedding gifts list is the proverbial fruit basket. This too seems like a nice safe gift until you ask yourself, "Would I really want a basket of apples, oranges, and fruits I could easily get at the supermarket?" If the answer is no, it's probably no for the bride and groom, too. Besides, as we've mentioned - someone else probably already got them one. Or two.

6) Anything you carry to the reception itself
It is apparently considered poor form to bring your wedding gift directly to the wedding or ceremony. The general consensus seems to be that mailing it or giving it shortly before or after the wedding is the best way to go. Bringing it to the ceremony makes the atmosphere seem like that of a birthday party, which it clearly isn't. Sadly, many, many guests still do this. So don't be one of them! If you have no other option other than bringing your gift to the reception, deliver it to the table for gifts or to a member of the wedding party first thing.

7) Bathroom Mats
Nothing signals the beginning of a yawning snoozefest like bathroom mats. A general rule you should adopt is to assume that the couple probably has all the generic household items they will need for the foreseeable future. Items like this are also a matter of personal preference. They will probably want to decide for themselves what colors, sizes, etc. to go with their home decor. So just avoid buying them, and you should be in the clear!

8) Candle Holders
Let's face it - candlelit dinners are very nice and romantic, but not every couple feels the same. Therefore, this seemingly safe gift might actually be consigned to the "ugh, I knew someone would buy us this" pile! Clearly, this isn't what you are going for, so try and avoid this one unless you know for certain that the couple enjoys using candles in their interior decorating.

9) Gift Cards to "Borderline" Restaurants
Restaurant gift cards are fine - IF they are for a classy, upscale restaurant befitting of a new bride and groom. If this sounds like a gift you want to give, go ahead, but try to avoid "borderline" locations. These are restaurants that seem classy, and may be perfectly fine for Saturday nights out with friends, but really aren't the kind of place you want to give cards to as wedding gifts. Places like Chilis, Applebees, and TGI Fridays come to mind. As a rule of thumb, don’t give gift cards to restaurants that you feel you could go to in casual attire.

10) Scrapbooks
Finally, a perennial generic wedding gift is the average, garden variety "do it yourself" scrapbook. The idea is that the bride and groom can spend idle nights on their honeymoon putting pictures into it and creating a lasting record of their memories. It sounds nice, and may actually work with some couples, but you shouldn't count on it. Other guests will probably give them one and it's another one of those gifts that really just advertises how little thought you put into the matter.

In the end, the goal is to give something that makes the bride and groom think of you when they see or use it. So don’t give a gift just because it’s what is expected. Give out of your genuine care for this newly married couple.