Couple's First Large Purchase
I'm going to be sick over Christmas break. I'm sick today-- really not feeling great. And am so sad that I'll be sick for Christmas, but another part of me is really happy that I am not going to be missing work because of getting sick. I really can't.
I am so sorry it's been like... two weeks since I last blogged. We bought a car (yikes!), Jeremy got through finals, and I've been plugging away at the wedding planning and now, here we are. :)
The car we bought was a 2006 Mitsubishi Lancer. It's red with grey interior, and is the newest car I've ever called mine; I'm thrilled. Jeremy still hasn't driven it, though. That's weird.
While we were there, at the dealership signing papers, Jeremy and I kept looking at each other, thinking the same thing: "we're buying CAR together." It was some other kind of something to see our names on a shared insurance card. To write a check from our joint bank account for a down payment. To see our names, right next to each other, lightly overlapping, on a title. So many "our"s. So many "us"s. It was another wave of realization that this is really happening-- we've fusing our lives together. Building it with every day we spend together, every disagreement we have, every trip we take, and every conversation we have about raising the beautiful children we'll have some day...and this feeling of immense closeness comes after already putting his name on our apartment lease and getting our joint bank account and booking an appointment with the country clerk's office for the legal part of the marriage (earlier on Thursday). We're getting our marriage license this week; I can't even imagine what that will be like.
Maybe, just like with so many other things with Jeremy, it's never going to settle. I'm never going to get used to it. Just like I'm still not used to or get over how handsome he is or how soft his lips are or or how safe I feel with him or how in love with him I am. Maybe I'm going to keep waking up every day amazed that he's there with me in the sheets WE bought in the house WE pay for with OUR kids running around downstairs. And that's okay. Living my life in amazement and with overwhelming gratitude sounds good to me.
Comments
Sheila on Dec 28, 2009
This is just the sweetest entry. For the first year Dave and I got married I would have to be touching him because I was afraid I would wake up and find it was all a dream and he was gone. I love how you express your feelings so beautifully. You are both so very precious. What an incredible couple you two make!!