According to the Chinese horoscopes, we have 12 animals signs. And depending on which year each of us is born in, we have a different horoscope sign.

There was a belief that two dragons cannot be staying together as they are both very fierce and domineering and will not give way to others.

There were also other beliefs that a wife with “Tiger” sign as her horoscope will be always bullying her husband who is a “Chicken”.

Nowadays, people date not based on their horoscopes, but most probably love at first sight or after getting to know each other better.

In ancient China, people used 6 pairings of horoscopes as guidelines for couples who wish to get married.

The incompatible ones are Rat and Horse, Ox and Ram, Tiger and Monkey, Rabbit and Rooster, DDragon and Dog and lastly Snake and Pig.

The reason is simply because of “clashing” horoscopes and the married couples won’t have a “good” married life.

In the past, parents and society at large won’t accept such marriages.

For example, the Snake may devour the Pig and if the wife is a Pig, she will be dominated by the husband. If it is the other way round, the woman will be oppressed and get hissed at a lot.

To marry somone one of incompatible horoscope is equal to bringing a tiger in to be your spouse. It is equivalent to a doomed fate which may be divorce, infertility, death or estrangement.

According to the horoscopes, a person who has a particular horosope is believed to possess a fixed set of charateristics, which is not really true.

For instance, the person with “Sheep” sign is kind and gentle and those with “Pig” sign are considered to be lazy and useless bumps which eat and sleep all day and night.

Those with “Rooster” sign are considered as laborious and very diligent.

The sad fact about believing all these traditional wedding taboos is the cause of many break-ups of couples who were truly in love.

But when love is concerned, the only thing that can be done is to restrict a person physically but not mentally and emotionally.

In modern times, some parents are still very particular about the horscopes of their future son or daughter-in-laws and they will look for great masters who may be feng-shui masters or geomancers.

Some ladies jump at every opportunity to be bridesmaids. Some need to carefully think about it for some time before they commit to the task.

Here, we are seeing 2 different types of bridesmaids.

For the first type of bridesmaids who always self-nominate themselves, it is quite pssoibly some may want to use such opportunity to flaunt themselves and even over-shadow the brides.

Thus, there is a taboo being created to restrain wannabe brides: the bridesmaids must not be more beuatiful than the bride.

However, this is not to mean in physical aspect but it actually meant that the bridesmaids must try not to have too heavy make-up or to wear too revealing clothes.

In a way, this is not to divert too much attention off the main star - the bride onto the bridesmaids.

However, I’m sure such people are rare and normally, bridesmaids are the bride’s best friends who really, from the bottom of their heart, to help out their best friend in such big life-transition event.

Another taboo for brides is that they can’t be bridesmaids more than twice as it may affect their marital luck. There could be some ladies out there who may already be in the right age to get married but not hitched yet. They may need to pay more attention to the number of times they are bridesmaids.

However, in this modern era, no one really bother much about this taboo.

In actual fact, the tasks for a bridesmaid is many.

5 roles a bridesmaid need to commit to:
1. inform the bride of all the nitty-gritty aspects of her wedding schedule
2. be the bride’s personal assistant
3. be the bride’s make-up artist
4. help the bride’s get water, wipe her sweat off and remind her to relax
5. remember all the customs and rituals that the bride needs to follow

It is really a big responsibilty and only ladies who are responsible, people-oriented, helpful and detailed can be bridesmaids.

Being very conservative Asian Chinese, our parents still do not share much about sex education with us.

And the children are expected to be taught in schools through science or some sexual education or they can figure out themselves while growing up and doing sexual experiment.

Parents still avoid talking about sex and they push the responsibilty to each other. Most parents even denied the existence of sex, letting their kids find out themselves.

Until one day it is too late and somebody gets someone preganant, this is when the dad may screamed “Don’t you know what is a condom?”

Oh, this is too late and “thanks” dad for the info.

I’m not sure if Chinese find it to be dirty and even disrespectful discussing about such topics. Disrespectful may even mean towards the gods.

I have heard about taboos of not having sex on the 1st and 15th of the lunar calendar as well as during eclipses, thunderstorms, typhoons and other extreme weather conditions.

Those who may wish to carry on “may be punished by their gods” for being disrespectful.

Not sure if this sounds weird, but do not have quickies in temples or near coffins. Women who are pregnant, in confinement or menstruating shouldn’t make love either.

Ancient Chinese find that women to have negative energy and if they still do it anyway, bad luck will befall on her and her husband.

What about other times when sex should be discouraged?

What about when you are moody or angry?

However, some ladies may debate that sex help them to destress and even drive their headaches away.

However, if there are times that you may not be in the mood to do it and your partner wants to get intimate anyway, you may want to consider the old excuse “Not tonigh honey. I am tired/ I got a very bad headache.”

One more interesting note to share with you. For husbands, don’t bathe immediately after making love as there is a belief that eventually the man’s “hot rod” may become a “cold fish” in the long run. I don’t know how true it is and it is up to you to believe.

It is never fair for women especially if their husbands passed away at the prime of their lives.

Who is to be blamed?

Not the husband of course. The women will be blamed for be ill-fated and bring bad luck to their husbands.

Brides are advised not to get too near to widows for fear they may encounter the same fate as these widows.

In ancient times, men are permitted to marry as and when they wished if they got sick of their wives. In addition, these men were seen as very capable as they could afford to have more than one wife.

I still remembered I read about this rich farmer who built a separate house for each of his four wives and he even got another wife when he was in his sixties!!!

However, for female, they didn’t get to share such status as men. In fact, women were considered as a lower class compared to men.

In any case for widows, they were not allowed to get married immediately but they had to spend three years in mourning. And if they wanted to remarry, they had to get the permission from the parents-in-law.

If it was denied, she had to work as a slave for the family till the last day of her life.

Very unfortunate and unfair, isn’t it?

Again in olden times, widows who didn’t remarry and managed to raise up thier children were awarded the plaue of chastity and they had to display their plaaues in the main hall to show that they had made an achievement of being dependant all these years.

In fact, women had been the focus of abuse and had been ill-treated because of how the culture, custom and society see them.

Nowadays, modern women could be financially dependant and if their husbands passed away before them, these women can choose for themselves if they want to remarry or not.

Wedding Bands: The neverending circle of a wedding band symbolizes eternal love by its lack of a beginning and an end. This tradition grew out of an ancient tribal custom of using circlets of grass to decorate a bride's wrist and ankles. The earliest evidence of wedding rings dates back to around 2800 B.C. in Egypt. In 860 the Roman Catholic pope (Nicholas I) declared that an engagement ring was required of all those who intended to marry; if either the man or woman later violated the vow to marry, he/she was excommunicated or banished to a nunnery. These were the times when women were thought of as property and the band was a sort of leash or band of ownership. The gold and silver commonly used for wedding bands today is derived from the customs of the Romans and Egyptians who loved precious metals and stones. And finally, the rings are worn on the third finger of the left hand because ancient cultures believed that finger had a vein running straight to the heart.

Bridesmaids were dressed in a similar way to the bride for the same reason as the origin of veil. The bridesmaids were thought to act as decoys to confuse evil spirits and thus protect the bride. Must be single

It is said that the first partner who buys a new item after the wedding will be the dominant one in the relationship.

Traditionally teochew bride is fetched to the groom's home before daylight. If it is really too early and the groom's relatives have not arrived for the tea ceremony, the couple can have a short rest or an outdoor photo-session while waiting.

Tea ceremony for the relatives on the bride's side is usually held in the afternoon when the couple complete the "bride's home visit".

In some family, the bride (and some will choose to do so together with the groom) may serve her parents tea in the morning before she is married. When she returns for the bride's home visit, she is already a married woman.

The order of service is usually
1) parents,
2) grandparents,
3) grand-uncles and grand-aunties,
4) uncles and aunties,
5) elder brothers and sisters,
6) elder cousins