Wedding Party
Introducing the super duper, hot, awesome, amazing, intriguing, intelligent, fun, sexy, entertaining, and sweet....
Wedding Party of Awesomeness!!!!
Jessica Dandeneau
Bride
Jessica was born a beautiful princess who's evil stepmothers locked her up in a tower and she could only allow people to see her by lowering down her long hair...
no wait, that's Rapunzel. Sorry...
Jessica is from Maine and Massachusetts but really found her home when she came down South to go to school at Winthrop.
Jess is an amazing dancer and received her degree in Dance from Winthrop and is currently trying to increase her awesomeness by going back to school!
Jess is actively continuing to pursue dance and is now a part of a new dance company here in Charlotte.
Jess is the love of Joe's life :-)
Joseph Jackson
Groom
Joe was born in 1980 during the first ever earthquake hurricane volcano of the world.
After the smoke had cleared Joe named himself and drank a beer to celebrate his birth.
When Joe was 7 he became the 1st man to walk on Mars.
When Joe was 11 he was named official Nobel Prize winner of the decade as he had already won a record 31 awards in the 11 years of his research. During his research the world was blessed with such discoveries as:
Universal Gravitation
The first micro-biotic organism
God's phone number
Computer translation of language
and 15,000 others
Joe has been reported as the only person to ever have a hit record on the moon.
Madeline Dandeneau
Maid of Awesomeness
Madeline is Jessica's sister... since birth.
Madeline and Jessica had a rough start to life when Jess tried to sell her baby sister off to a band of traveling merry-men but was foiled by her parents.
Madeline and Jess later reconciled and have become best friends to this day.
Karl Buchholz
Best Man (I guess technically he's a man)
Karl and Joe met in South America by chance when Karl was trafficking pygmy albino leprechauns and Joe was "on a business trip".
Karl was instantly attracted to Joe (as are most people) but it took many hours of stalking and phone calls before Joe took a liking to Karl.
Karl eventually tracked down information on Joe that lead him to attending the same college as Joe. Unable to secure a roommate position with Joe Karl did the next best thing and struck up a friendship with Joe's freshman roommate.
Joe and Karl have been best friends since early 1998.
Karl has recently decided to follow along in Joe's footsteps and becoming engaged himself.
Jane`
Bride's Maid of Awesomeness
Jane and Jessica are 1st cousins and are only separated in age by 2 days. Which of course makes Jane, smarter, wittier, sillier, and crazier in every way.
Jane currently lives in Chicago with her dog Diesel and serves in the US Navy.
Her current rank: Super Awesome Captain of Awesomeness.
David Levi "Sexy Cool" Dandeneau
Head Awesomeness that is another Best Man
David "Sexy Cool" Dandeneau is rumored to have been raised by wolves who were raised by Awesome creatures from the planet awesome. There's no other explaining how he could have gotten so much awesome inside himself without being any blood relation to Joe.
You might have heard about David before though for some of his other works:
1995: David officially announced that he was going pro in all major sports
1996: David retired from all major sports owning every record for every position ever.
1997: Invented a time machine
1745: stopped the first Armageddon
2000: prevented Y2K
2012: Prevented the second Armageddon
2010: Dominated the universe and attending the wedding event of the history of hte world... no, he said so himself since he's been to every wedding ever with his time machine and all.
David is the best Disc Golf player in the great state of Massachusetts too.
Jess and Joe are both blessed to have him in their wedding.
Lianne Jackson
Maid of Awesomeness to the Bride
Lianne "Big O" Jackson AKA "Slippery Vixen" is the half-sister of the Groom but critics have speculated whether or not the 1/2 was more like 2/3rds as the amount of "Awesome" contained in her is resoundingly similar to those found in her brother.
Lianne is a junior at Hollins University and is majoring in creative writing. Some would say that she has "wicked poetry skillz". Lianne would say something like this in limerick form...
Lianne is a poetry nugget,
Some might say she's trumpet,
but you too will agree she's as sharp as a tree,
and if you don't believe, you can suck it!
Joe and Jess both are pleased to have Lianne at their wedding.
Greg Baker
Best Man 2.0 (not any less or more of a man than you may have heard)
Greg Baker and Joe Jackson go together much like a stapler and kittens...
Greg and Joe have been close friends since their days on the cattle drive back in the late 1800s.
Greg and Joe met in high school and Joe still refers to him as his only good friend from high school.
Judge
In charge of smelling up the place
Judge is the greatest dog in the universe EVER!
Judge dominates everything he comes into contact with.
Judge will literally rip your face off if you get too close.
Judge = awesome.
