I think I may have actually reached that point in wedding planning that I've heard referred to as the lull.
I didn't think that, with a five month long engagement and all the unexpected busy-ness that life generally seems to dig up, I would ever get to fully experience this particular sensation. I thought that maybe things would come to a more mellow stage of rush and run, but I never imagined that the roar of semi-conscious planning chatter that has been my brain's soundtrack for the past several months would ever be truly silenced.
Which, honestly, is making me nervous.
Am I really, truly, actually going through a planning dry spell? My very own, if you will, bridge over troubled water? The point at which I get to sit in the sun and dangle my feet over the turbulence and watch the progression of things set into motion move forward into this thing that will become one of the most memorable days of my life?
Or (as I am increasingly inclined to believe) am I merely managing to put into effect years and years of training in the art of procrastination?
This is what scares me. There are (I am sure of this, deep down somewhere inside my eerily quiet mind) dozens and dozens of items on my mental to-do list. And, although I've been very carefully avoiding it, I know there are probably things on my actual pen-and-ink to-do list as well. Like find shoes so I can get my dress altered. And make sure that centerpieces get put together in tangible form (instead of simply running around a very small corner of my still silent brain as a colorful collection of flowers and glass jars that may or may not work in practice). And finish designing those invitations.
Unfortunately, there are two things going on right now. First, I'm somehow able to instantly forget all of those things I just mentioned (really, they're gone) because I no longer feel the looming pressure of that activity-inducing thing I fondly refer to as a deadline.
And second, I think I mismanaged my personal resources. I treated the planning process as a sprint, not the marathon it actually is. Seriously. A few weeks into engagement and I was big-picture ready (location, check, photographer, check, food, check) and now I'm (literally) sleeping eleven hours a night and absent-mindedly thumbing through piles of wedding magazines (see photo) while I'm actually thinking about which vegetables I'd like to plant in my garden. And I've officially decided that I'd rather cuddle on the couch than talk wedding details and, unfortunately, my ultimate partner in crime (aka Shayne) is not likely to attempt to convince me otherwise.
But there is hope on the horizon. Rumor has it our wedding bands (which we picked out a couple of weeks ago) are in and we can go pick them up tomorrow. Which, as symbols of the vows we'll soon be making, may be just enough reminder of what I'm running towards to get me back in the race.
Or, maybe, I'll realize that a lull is a lull and all this concern is simply wedding energy with nowhere to go. In which case I'll sit back and watch Kate and William's wedding bliss while vaguely pondering my own upcoming nuptials. I think I'm pulling for option b.