7 Modern Wedding Trends Your Parents Just Don’t Understand
But don’t know how to tell you.
From not knowing what to order on your gluten-free wedding menu to being told they can’t take photos, there are a number of modern big-day details that will probably confuse your parents. To prepare you for potential questions (and maybe even a few battles) from parents on both sides of the aisle, here are a few stand-out pet peeves of the parental set.
Huge Wedding Parties
Wedding parties seem to be getting bigger and bigger, with as many as a couple dozen attendants standing with the bride and groom. Your parents may think it’s silly to have so many people involved in the ceremony (we’ve even heard some parents jokingly refer to a large bridal party as the wedding village), but this rarely evolves into a larger fight. In the event they continue to push the subject, let them know how important it is to you to have all of your nearest and dearest stand at your side during your vows.
Uncommon Food Selections
Gluten- and dairy-free meals, and vegan-friendly options are popping up on menus across the country, and while your parents are all for accommodating everyone, they may miss classic wedding fare (filet and mashed potatoes, anyone?). In addition to serving options that all your guests can eat, you should also aim to include more common, familiar foods for anyone who isn’t an adventurous diner.
An Unplugged Wedding
Many couples ask their guests to refrain from taking photos during their wedding, emphasizing that their photographer can capture the day in its full scope. But if there’s one thing parents hate, it’s being told they can’t snap their own photos, too. Go easy on the restrictions and save this rule for the ceremony only.
Moving Around Too Much
No guest enjoys being pushed from space to space, and parents are particularly annoyed by having to quickly move from one section of the party to another. You may consider a conversation with your team about a gentle approach to moving guests—whether it’s from the ceremony to cocktail hour or from the the reception on to the buses at the end of the night.
The older generation often waits until the wedding cake is cut to make their exit. However, modern couples are trading traditional cakes for dessert tables and extending the celebration well into the night with an after-party. While this may not be an actual pet peeve for the parents, it can be a bit confusing for them and their friends.
When Too Much Happens Online
Wedding websites are often the source of all of the information about the day’s festivities that didn’t fit on the invitation. But when your website becomes the main tool of communication, your parents (and their friends) may miss some of these essential details.
A Packed Agenda
You and your friends are excited about an entire weekend of events, but your parents might not be up for non-stop partying. This is an easy one to solve: Pad your itinerary with optional activities, and make it clear that while everyone’s presence is hoped for at any and every event, you and your groom understand if some guests want to sit certain events out.
This story originally appeared on Martha Stewart Weddings.