Wedding Planning

Your First Holiday Season as Newlyweds

Tips for handling the holiday season together with grace.

This time of year can be so exciting for newlyweds. With the holiday season right around the corner, you are looking forward to a ton of special, memorable moments together. Unfortunately, now that you have joined together two families, you may be experiencing a little push and pull. Both sets of parents want to see you and have you participate in their traditions. How do you keep everyone happy and make time for just the two of you to start new traditions?

1. Accept that not everyone is going to be happy all the time.

It’s true in life and it’s certainly true here.  Sometimes you might have to skip a holiday activity you love so that you can do something with his family and vice versa.  Family members are going to be disappointed, and in extreme cases, even angry. But if you are kind and sincere and explain the situation, then eventually you have to let it go. If they continue to be unhappy about it, that’s on them. Trust us when we tell you that it won’t be this way for long. When new family members enter the picture, there’s always some transition issues, and then things settle down.

2. Try to be as fair as possible.

If you both want to see your families at Christmas, and it isn’t possible to do both because of distance, it’s time to come to some agreements. Most couples opt to do alternating years. If you live close enough, make time for both families and attend the most important events for each. For example, your family might live for Christmas Eve cookie baking and his might love nothing more than caroling on Christmas night. Make both of those events your non-negotiables, and work out the rest from there.

3. Do what you both want and don’t be afraid to set boundaries.

Don’t really want to hop on a flight on Christmas Eve to visit your family in Florida?  That’s okay. Do what you can to smooth any hurt feelings, but stick to your joint decision. You don’t want your holiday season dominated by plans that feel like obligations you’ve been guilted into. Just make sure that, somehow, you are making each family feel equally appreciated and loved.  And by the way, it’s also totally and completely okay to want a Christmas with just the two of you.  So, if all you really want under the tree is a quiet day spent by the fire, then do it!

Photography   |   Lovesome Photography